When did “Soc”-ial Media become “Sex”-ual Media?

Boobs and butts. Everywhere on social. Everywhere.

Today an article about “micro cheating” (yes it’s a thing and has nothing to do with the size of someone’s appendage) appeared in my feed— Is going to a strip club or following hot people on Instagram cheating?

The article raises the fair point that a partner might feel slightly miffed if they find you are following randoms on socials for their hotness.

Fair question, and it fits in with something I’ve been mulling over lately.

All that hotness on socials.

Sitting on a bus recently I was flicking through Insta and was surprised at some of the images in my feed.

Amongst the endless array of selfies, scenery, selfies, food and, oh selfies #stoptheselfies, there was a smattering of nudity, both male and female.

No, I’m not talking those harmless holiday shots of people frollicking along some beach some place you’d rather be right now than on the bus heading to work.

Nuh uh.

Actual purposeful nudity.

Not often genitals, although sometimes they sneak through, but quite often boobs and butts.

Duh, I hear you say, that’s nothing new. There are even articles that point you at the feeds deemed “the most sexiest”.

I’m not talking feeds like “Cheeky Exploits” or “Get Naked Australia” that are tongue in cheek — butt cheek that is.

I’m NO PRUDE.

Nudity is great.

Sex is pretty damned awesome too (well, not always so awesome, let’s be honest…)

I’m not even opposed to porn so long as it’s legal and within the bounds of relatively accepted sexual practices (sure sure, each to their own but still…) that don’t seek to exploit anyone in the making.

I’m also very very cool with apps like Tindr and Grindr and Bumble etc because so long as you know what you’re in for (ie 99% hook-up, 1% other), and you make sure you use them in a way that’s safe and doesn’t put you at risk, it’s all good.

There is even research pointing at socials actually helping young people when it comes to exploring their sexuality.

But sexy times or pics on more open, generally social platforms like Insta and Facebook from random people who only post nudies or semi-nudies of themselves?

Maybe even friends.

Sometimes…family members.

Yikes.

No. Just no.

Besides the fact that these are relatively uncensored channels, albeit with the ability to report content any user feels shouldn’t be there, it bamboozles me that anyone would just let it all hang out on socials.

What if your mum sees it?

Or your grandma?

Sure, they’ve seen it all before, but more likely than not a long long longggg time ago, and probably don’t want to see it again now.

Or how about your 8-year-old son or niece or, if you’re a school teacher, one of your students seeing it?

Ok, I can already hear the howls of “stop trying to censor us”

The arguments from the historians amongst you arguing that the most celebrated painters and sculptors and more recently photographers have been presenting us with the naked form since Adam was…nude.

And of course the most obvious — if you don’t like what you see, don’t use socials.

Fair points, and yet they all point to what is being taken away from me when people post random nude shots on social — choice.

I know I shouldn’t be that surprised by any of this. This sexualisation of social media ties into one of my bugbears about socials — the notion that they have become less about the “social” and more about the “me”. Not content with dating apps where doing a little fleshly advertising is par for the course, people are looking to spread their nets wider in the hunt for…well…whatever it is they’re hunting for.

Mostly likes and “kind” words, I suspect…mostly just a bit more ego preening.

Which I get. There is no denying the intrinic aspect of human nature of wanting to be liked, loved, adored even, although some humans seem to need this slightly more (read: much more) than others, which is their shizz so whatever.

And I love how beautiful the human form can be.

How people honestly revel in their own beauty, nude or otherwise, conventional or not so.

Loving yourself is GOOD — that’s defo not what my beef is about.

BUT I don’t wanna see your boobs and butts and crotches flashed in my feeds.

You wouldn’t walk down the street naked (OK, some of you would), so why do it on socials?

Don’t walk away from reading this piece thinking I’m trying to shame nudity or people who enjoy being nude.

Hardly.

But if you like showing yourself to the world, sure, bore us with your endless selfies in the same way I’ll bore you with endless sunsets and coffee and travel pics.

Just keep the nudity for PMs or behind digital closed doors.

Have just a little bit of respect.

For us.